Suave's Republique Cricket


De Nederlanders slaan de Engelsen
Where's Dirty Dirk?!

De Nederlanders celebrate a famous victory over The England.

What the fuck happened there?!

Destiny, my friends, that’s what.

After mastering total football in the 70’s under Johan Cruyff, de Nederlanders have now decided to do the same in 20/20 cricket.

Watch out boys and girls, they were unstoppable  (except by Ze Germans) at football during that time, and are bound to do the same to all and sundry in this 20/20 World Cup (luckily Ze Germans are not here).  Never before has there been such a sublime display of a cricket, from a side wearing oranje.

Dirty Dirk bowled well, without any real penetration.

It was left to a couple of old blacksmiths to cause the damage.  Darron Reekers who started off in big bludgeoning style, followed up by Tom De Grooth, who smashed The England all over Lords.   Jrod loved it so much he almost threw up!

My man Ryan Ten Doeschate even got in on the act, a cracking allround display, with a red inker and taking the wickets of Ravi Bopara & Luke Wright.

The England have two young stars at the top of their order, and the rest are a bunch of cunts.   Even Rob Key, the fat knacker.

The bowling, beyond the opening pair was shithouse.   Rashid looked good against the West Indies, but was goes for too many runs.  He reminds me of Stuart MacGill, long hops, full tosses and the odd unplayable delivery.  No fucking good at 20/20, I’m afraid (and surely the fact that he doesn’t get in Yorkshire’s side, should have given them some idea, no?).

Stuart Broad couldn’t hit six stumps, the useless Ricky Schroder lookalike fucktrog.

I’m happy to lose to the Dutch though, because it might make this bunch of fuckfaced De Engelsen players actually learn to play proper 20/20 cricket.   Hardly any of them actually play it,  they’re learning the game in T20i’s.

Here’s to getting spanked by Pakistan on Sunday, and being out of the competition within 3 days!  Good times, my friends!



Stupid ‘Strayans
September 26, 2008, 10:16 am
Filed under: Cricket | Tags: , , , , ,

What is it with ‘strayans and warm up game injuries.

Tee Hee.

Tee Hee.

The 2005 Ashes was decided when Glenn McGrath tripped over a stray cricket ball playing rugby.

News has just reached Suave HQ that Dirty Dirk, him of the snowboarding and skiing skills, has come a cropper playing football, and had to miss Middlesex CCC’s last game of the season.  Dick.

He can do all of this, but gets ankle knack from football?! I thought he was tough..

He can do all of this, but gets ankle knack from football?! I thought he was tough..

That’s him flying through the air miles in the sky.  Impressive, eh?

Alas, he can’t fucking stand up when playing a little Association Football though can he?

SILLY ‘STRAYANS and their silly warm up injuries, maybe they should stick to indoor bowls.