Suave's Republique Cricket

Hello you sausage.

Well fuck my old boots. The England done won it, when they should have been spanked like a naughty orphan!

This is good. Wing Commander seems to look back in best form, and I’m doing fairly well in Sportsfreak’s tipping competition!

A couple of things alarmed me.  Paul Collingwood looks like he’s batting with a matchstick instead of a big bloody bat!  Ian Bell, should spend less time hiding his ginger, and more time remembering he has all the talent in the world!  The little fuckstick doesn’t seem to be able to avoid fielders for love nor money. Strawberry haired arse.

Monty did well, but should be doing this more often.  He’s still on my list for a slap, but he’s probably given himself a weeks grace.

Jimmy Anderson is still in line for a slap, although he’s averaging better than any recent series.   If he could stop bowling pie-pie-pie-jaffer-longhop-pie,  I’d be happy!
I’m a little pre-occupied at the minute, as I’m job hunting, but we will be back on it big time soon..

15 Comments so far
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I wondered whether Bell had a strawberry haired arse too.

Comment by Ceci Masters

hee hee hee – think you’ll like this Suave… Adam Mountford’s blog on the Beeb site – I quote a paragraph – this was one of several e-mails received during the recent match…

“Willie Montgomery Stack told us how the elements affected his cricketing activities. “We have high winds here in Norfolk today,” he said. “The match between The Grenadier Guards and Felching C.C. has been abandoned after just a couple of overs. Our 79 year old leg spinner Harry “howzat” Agnew (no relation) was hoping to take his 1,000th wicket for the club.”

I do believe Adam has been stuffed…

Original at

Comment by Ceci Masters

I Played against Felching CC once, they suck.

No need for a boom boom Suave, you know i’ll be here all week.

Comment by J Rod

Brilliant Ceci! TMS have been taken from behind!

Jrod, nice work fella.

Comment by Suave

I bet Shane Thomson was captain of the Felching CC

Comment by sportsfreak

Someone had got to cricketwithballs by googling Felching CC yesterday. I blame your Shane Thomson comment, Sportsfreak.

Comment by miriam

It could be that, or it could be Jrod showing his true colours of late..

That boy bats for both sides, I reckon.

Comment by Suave

Does one necessarily need to bat for both sides to be into that, Suave?

Comment by miriam

Not cessinarily, Mims, but I’m guessing it’s that way after the trawling of gay bombay of late..

Comment by Suave

Confession: I found the gay bombay.

Comment by miriam

ha! Looking for some hot mano y mano where we Mims! Nice.

Comment by Suave

I’d love to say that I was that exciting, but no. I sometimes do a cricket news search on google to see what’s goin down in the world of cricket, and found it there.

Comment by miriam

“pie-pie-pie-jaffer-longhop-pie” is the perfect description of an average Jimmy Anderson over.

Whereas “pie-pie-pie-jaffercake-langoustine-pie” is the perfect description of an average Jimmy Ormond lunch.

Nice use of swearing btw, which as every gentlemen knows, is very much an art.

Comment by lentheyorkshirekitman

Thanks Len..

Good old Jimmy Ormond, he does love his food that boy!

Comment by Suave

In Shane Thomson’s case, felching was a very heterosexual activity.

Albeit with someone twice his age.

Comment by sportsfreak

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