Suave's Republique Cricket

Back and bad.

Je suis retourné.

There has been a fair bit to talk about over the weekend.

Much that has been covered by my peers..

Jason “Dizzy” Gillespie has retired from Australian cricket.

By retired, I mean forced out.

The ICL is evil, as we all know now. Any player who signs up, is the Anti-Christ, and deserves to burn in the fiery depths of hell.

Dizzy will have an eternity being smashed all around the ground, by the worst batsmen in history. (reminds me of 2005)

Shane Bond will break down injured, and have to continue bowling for ever and ever. Never getting any one out, and continually getting more and more fucked up.

Lou Vincent, will find the true meaning of depression, when the devil spends eternity depressing his big size 10 into Vincent’s knackers.

Two rotten fuckers from Safferland, have broken the world record for highest opening partnership.
They did it by smashing small boys into a pulp, for kicks.

India beat Australia, in the first final of the second most tedious CB series in history (The England winning last year, was a million times worse).

Harbajhan Singh has been accused of molesting every Australian in history’s mother, and on mothering sunday too. The bastard.
It’s also been claimed that he’s impregnated every Australian woman, thereby cuckolding all ‘Strayan men.
This is making the ‘Strayan public at large, relatively unhappy.

Ryan Sidebottom & Paul Collingwood have both been declared fit, ahead of the 1st Test vs New Zealand.
A nice piece from my good friend SportsFreak, discusses the merits of both teams.

An update of my own will be coming shortly.

8 Comments so far
Leave a comment

He’s impregnating all the women is he? Thanks for the warning. See WA stands for Wait Awhile, and in this case that’s a good thing. I can be prepared and have a cricket bat on standby to whack him over the head if he gets near me.

Comment by Miss Field

It’s already happened I’m afraid.

He’s used secret magic stuff, to do it as you all slept.

There will be a Harbajhan army in 8 months.

Comment by Suave

Being an old bowler in the ICL is like being a once great actor reduced to fielding mockery in panto.

Comment by King Cricket

‘Fielding’ seems a bit ambiguous, reading that back. ‘Enduring’ maybe.

Comment by King Cricket

and they say nothing happens on weekends??

btw indian colts won minor worldcup too…if you are interested…

Comment by straight point

I tend to agree, old kingy..

I just think it’s a crying shame, no english player is going to face Shane Bond in this series. The fact that NZC gave him permission to play in the ICL, then banned him, is ludicrous. When the cash cow says jump, world cricket says, how higgh!

Straight Point,
Sub-continental teams always win the u-19 world cups, don’t they?

Comment by Suave

Oh my goodness.

A Bhaji Army would be worse than that other ‘army’ and maybe even worse than the armies of Mordor.

Plus, ew.

Comment by Miss Field

It will be all powerful, and able to bowl a doosra!

There will be no escape from the Bhaji Army, and it’s chief weapon of ewwww!

Comment by Suave

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