Suave's Republique Cricket

A weekend of wonderment.

A few things happened over the weekend (I very rarely touch t’internet, as I don’t get paid for it over that precious time!)

Kiwi’s lulling us into a false sense of security!

It appears my Hulk Smash predictions, have already come to bite me on the arse (and a rather suave arse it is, if I do say so myself).

New Zealand bowled The England out for a measly 130. Ace Shah, involved in all three run outs. Cook coming in for Luke Wright and being a bit shit. Bopara came in for the Sri Aussie superstar, and stayed true to his recent form, by being absolutely shit. The long hop he smacked to a fielder, would have been smashed out of the park, if he was wearing his Essex pyjamas..

Ian Bell had the following to say, in his column in The Independent.

“But hats off to the Black Caps. They went into the match under enormous pressure and they responded really well. They bowled superbly straight on the drop-in pitch and fielded like tigers. We suffered three run-outs, which typified our efforts on the day a bit.

It shouldn’t have happened, but in our defence I’d make the point about the peculiarity of New Zealand grounds. Many of them are primarily rugby stadiums – for which purpose they were built – which makes for some odd pitch placements and boundary perimeters.

It also means there is no conventional square so that a ball, struck from a drop-in pitch, is effectively travelling over a rugby pitch, softer, springier turf making the ball hold up.”

Which translates as…

We were shit, they were good, but it’s them bloody rugby stadiums wot done it. we wuz scared Jonah Lomu was going to come and sack us.

Wing Commander Andrew Strauss

Had another shocker, scoring 10 before losing his wicket, to the truly amazing, bestest bowler in the universe, Iain O’Brien.  That boy is good (and in true Coming to America style), Good and terrible!

Australia vs India, MCG.

A game took place at the MCG yesterday too, which was played on a pitch, that seemed to be made of treacle. How is it that King Probot managed to score 65 no, whilst no one else seemed to be able to hit it off the square. Maybe this is what makes him one of the top ODI players in world cricket? He looks average at all times, yet scores lots on really shit pitches.. Stranger things have happened at sea.

Ishant Sharma, at his mark, ready to deliver a rising ball to the shoulder of YOUR bat!

Ishant Sharma had a cracking game, with 4-38, which would have been much better had he not been smashed for 18 off one over.  Super bowling from the young fella, he was pitching just short of a good length, and really getting it to lift.  Ponting was fending just under his chin, and it still took the shoulder of the bat.

I remember when Stephen Harmison used to be able to do that.

Let’s hope that Sri Lanka can raise their game, and make this CB series as interesting as it looks on paper.

9 Comments so far
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I don’t think Ronald Bell can really afford to blame the rugby grounds for England being crap, he might find a pack of All Blacks after him. Although it would be a damn funny sight.

Comment by Miss Field

That’s what he was scared of, when he was in the middle!

Poor babybell.

Comment by republiquecricket

Has there been an update on whether Graeme Swann broke his finger-nail (extension?) when dropping Cult Hero Jessie?

Shit he looked very worried about it afterwards…

Comment by Sportsfreak

He was gutted, because he’d just had a nice nailjob, by those lovely thai ladies at, nails R us.

He had the St Georges flag, painted on them, with a french tip.

Looked fetching, and it can be expensive, at £15 a go.

Comment by republiquecricket

I, am, really, liking the, comma, today.
Must, wake, up, and construct sentances, properly.

Comment by republiquecricket

Harmison was good when he could do that. I used to back him to go places then…

Comment by Soulberry

Me too, Soulberry..

Somewhere along the line he lost it though..

If he can re-discover it, England will be a force in test cricket again!

Comment by republiquecricket

That’s a gargantuan if my friend.

Comment by Miss Field

It is, but you never know.. Stranger things have happened at sea!

Comment by republiquecricket

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