Suave's Republique Cricket

I’m on to you Uncle…
February 1, 2008, 12:02 pm
Filed under: Cricket, LOLCricket

You Can Haz SloWalk To The Pavillion!

I had a strange web search appear on my Blog today..

suave loves Matthew Hayden

Is that you messing J Rod? Or is the world going mad?

The good news with that is, that whoever is searching for this, is obviously going to be a little disappointed when they get here.

Here’s some Matthew Hayden hate, for whomsoever it was..

1. Christians bother me full stop..
2. If he was a real Christian, he would cross himself everytime he scored a century.
3. Because he’s a FatHeadFlatTrackBully.
4. Because he’s too good.
5. I reckon he eats orphans for mid afternoon snacks.

Dear lord, I bet they get some buffoon like FatHeadFlatTrackBully to sign up for it, and put his stupid ugly face all over it..

If that happens, I’m visiting their offices, fully loaded up, and the aftermath will be like the scene in the 1st Matrix film, where they rip up the foyer of the headquarters type building.

Egads man…

You’re screwing with my young and impressionable mind..

First you lull me in, giving me lovely Robert Key, then you thwack me with the FatHeadFlatTrackBully…

It’s pleasure, then pain.

It’s either a life in threapy or a life getting spanked roughly by a nice looking dominatrix.

THe pain, the pleasure, THE PAIN, the pleasure. THE PAIN…

Excuse me, I think I need to take myself off, for a quiet word (that’s what the kidz are calling it these dayz. nudge nudge wink wink!)

Uncle J,

To you, Hayden may be less annoying than McGill, but to myself, and our esteemed friend at, you find we reserve special amounts of vitriol for the fatheadflattrackbully..
Hayden is the anti-christ.
I often dream of seeing his face cracked like an egg from a rip-snorting bouncer. (picture Mr. Gatting with his nose split in two)

Unfortunately, they wear helmets to protect them from this now, so it only occurs in my sleep.

6 Comments so far
Leave a comment

No it wasn’t me, but i had similar on my blog.

Comment by Uncle J rod

Bloody hell..

Who would seriously think I loved Matthew Hayden. There’s some sick puppies out there.

Comment by republiquecricket

plz to have more lolcricktz?

Comment by Miriam

Ya know, you should have put suave loves Matthew Hayden in quotation marks, otherwise one might take it completely out of context. 😉

Comment by Miss Field

Since one of mine said Uncle J rod loves queensland, i’m assuming it was a guy by the handle of DID…

Comment by Uncle J rod

I wish I’d thought of these. Kudos to “did”.

Comment by Miriam

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