Suave's Republique Cricket

You big F*cken jessie!
January 29, 2008, 9:15 am
Filed under: Cricket | Tags: , ,

So Shaun Tait is feeling a bit emotional?!

I’m going all EMO, I’ll be listening to Marilyn Manson and cutting myself soon!

Shaun Tait has quit all forms of cricket indefinitely, due to emotional and physical exhaustion.

Fuck off, you big halfwit!

This guy is supposed to be a grunt, who likes knocking batsmen’s heads off, and he’s crying off of state and national cricket.


I’m hoping he’ll be back for next years Ashes series, as he’s always worth a few free runs.

57 Comments so far
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You idiot.

Comment by JB

Why thank you JB, that’s the nicest thing anyone’s said to me since A White Van Man called me a wanker, this morning!

Comment by republiquecricket

he’s obviously met you.

Comment by JB

Genius, I find your witty ripostes, most amusing!

Comment by republiquecricket

I change my mind, you are ok! 🙂

Comment by JB

Are you the ‘ugly side of English cricket’, the equivalent of a soccer hooligan? It seems so. And I thought Englishmen knew something about cricket; you just seem to like mouthing off. Being a dickhead though is not guaranteed to make you funny, just … a dickhead.

Comment by raydixon

Thanks JB, you seem like a decent fella yourself!
I like a man who can give, as well as take a bit of stick!
And you’re more than welcome here.

Comment by republiquecricket

thanks mate,

Bit harsh on Tait though.

Even tough guys have feelings! Just look at Symonds!

Comment by JB

I wouldn’t suck up to him JB, I think he’s a throwback to “The Young ones”.

Comment by raydixon

Ray, thanks for your comments. It’s always a pleasure to have an intelligent fellow, like yourself commenting.
As for whether I know anything about Cricket. More than enough.
I just choose to use my blog as a braindump.

I’m no hooligan, raydixon, just a semi-literate, angry fool.

If you’re not happy with the content, you know where the next button is.

Good day to you sir.

Comment by republiquecricket


You are probally right, but was a funny show.

I like the latest post. Symonds would rip Harbhajan apart. I wonder how much the TV rights would go for in India?

Comment by JB

It is, but I find it hard to comprehend how a man at that age, and with a fair amount of talent, has to give it in, because he’s feeling a bit tired and emotional..
It’s probably for the best. He’s obviously not tough enough to play international cricket.

I am being harsh on him, because I like him as a player. If he could improve his line a little, he’d be world class.

It’s taken Brett Lee years to get to that level, he used to spray as much as Tait does now, and now look at him.

Comment by republiquecricket

I love the content, it’s good for a (brief) laugh. Pity you can’t “take a bit of stick” though.

Comment by raydixon

I can take as much as you can sling, raydixon!

As I said, if you can give it, you got to take it..

You too, are more than welcome.

There’s nothing I like more than the natives getting restless.

Comment by republiquecricket

JB, I would pay to watch it. A celebrity death match.
I don’t thing Singh would last more than about 30 seconds.

Comment by republiquecricket

Too much pressure at too young an age. Some people crack I guess. Wasn’t it Marcus Trescothick that went home from the last Ashes series with depression?

Tait has the talent and he might make it. But I guess his poor perfromance in Perth was all too much for the guy.

It’s a pity and a shame (remember how well he did at the world cup). I hope he comes back fit and strong, because Australia needs game breakers as so many of them have retired.

I guess there is one question. Why was there no support from players and the ACB to help him deal with it? Another question I guess is whether or not there should be.

Comment by JB

It was indeed.. With Trescothick, started as a family thing. Bad things kept happening, while he was away on tour, and he started believing it was his fault. He’s also been diagnosed with Clinical depression, which is no laughing matter (although I do, as i’m a twisted f*ck).

Tait’s been superb in the one day format, and I assumed he’d be a shoe in for the Tri-Nation series.

Maybe he’d heard something in advance?

You would think that there would be some support, eh.. Even from South Australia, as his main employer.

Comment by republiquecricket

Tait’s OK. Brett Lee ‘disappeared’ for a while too, after a rocket-like start to his Test career. And even when he came back it wasn’t until he wasn’t nearly 30 that he became the steady performer he is today. (Aussie) cricketers seem to take longer to mature these days and I think it’s that simple. Mind you, I’ve no idea how old Tait is. Maybe he’s already close to 30? If so then it’s all over. But if he’s closer to 20, he’ll be back, for sure.

Comment by raydixon

He’s only 24, so maybe a break will bring him back stronger, and for ‘Straya’s sake, straighter.

Unfortunately for England, I think we’ve seen the last of Marcus Trescothick. A wonderful batsman, and we really could do with someone that attacking at the top of the order, but he’s a liability now.

We can’t afford to have a batsman that can’t tour. And at 32, we should be looking at someone to play with Cook, who can get off to a flyer.

Comment by republiquecricket

Wow, settle down kids.

This blog is awesome. Real Australians can laugh at themselves. I love my boys, and nothing will change that but I also appreciate Suave’s mighty fine effort here.

Comment by Miss Field

Thanks Miss-Field..
I reckon I’m holding my own though 😉

These guys are giving as much as they’re getting, and I think they know realise, I’m all about the sarcasm and vitriol.

Comment by republiquecricket

You are not.

Comment by JB

JB. Holding my own, or the sarcasm and vitriol?

It looks like I’m losing this battle, and I’m now feeling physically and emotionally exhausted.

I might have to quit for an indefinite period, take to listening to EMO and cutting myself, and laying in the foetal position

Comment by republiquecricket

I was being sarcastic. You do need a break!

Comment by JB

I’m fine kidder.

There’s nothing in this world, that could make me want to listen to EMO

Comment by republiquecricket

Holding your own … at 11 in the morning? Please, even in Australia we wait for the cover of darkness before doing that! By the way, who the hell are EMO? Do they sound anything like Lee Kernaghan, the Australian of the Year?

Comment by raydixon

I work in an office with a lot of pretty women..

EMO, is emotional rock.. It’s songs by sad little kids with angled black hair, and black clothes.
The sort of stuff Goths listen too..

Australian of the year? I’ve never heard of the fella, and he’s a county singer. That should discount him immediately.

I would have thought, Kevin Rudd as new PM, would have to be in with a shout.

Comment by republiquecricket

Lee Kernaghan has never been ‘heard of’ outside of those (thankfully few) people who think country is actually a style of credible music. Obviously our new PM is one of that minority. No surprises there; he’s a good politician but an absolute nerd.

Back to Tait – so he’s only 24? Don’t write him off then, he’s just a boy who might be missing his mummy. He’ll get over it and blast the begeezus out of England in the next Ashes series, which is in ….?

Comment by raydixon

2009, next summer is the return.

Hopefully, we can make it a little closer than the last one! 😉

Comment by republiquecricket

No chance, I hear we’re bringing Warnie back for one last ‘fling’ (on the field). Cheers.

Comment by raydixon

You put this piece out as bait, fishing for a big fat 16 stone Grigg’s didn’t you!

Comment by Brad Griggs

Wow, i only got one person angry at me, and he didn’t put his name to it.

Sorry i wasn’t over here to protect you old chap, after all you’ve done it for me countless times.

As for Emo’s i interviewed the guitarist from my chemical romance recently, nice guy, doesnt like the word emo.

Comment by Uncle J Rod

Oh and is tait related to Harmison?

Comment by Uncle J Rod

I love the fact, that I can produce vitriol in others so easily! It’s like shooting fish in a barrel!

Nae bother big man. I can beat up most of the England team, I reckon I’ll be alright!

I’ve seen him interviewed (not quite the same as your efforts), and he does seem like a cool fella.
can’t stand his music though.

It reminds me of a South Park episode I saw, when one of the boys loses his girlfriend, and becomes a goth.

All those outsiders, hating the normals, for wearing the same clothes, and listening to the same music!

No, Harmison only loses it away from home.

Comment by republiquecricket

Suave, I’m impressed by your ability to de-fuse a potential situation. I think there’s a permanent role for you in: India-Aus matches, Pakistan dressing rooms.

Comment by Miriam

Brad, I did..

Like I said, shooting fish in a barrel!

Comment by republiquecricket

In truth Miriam, it’s because I’m a lover not a fighter.

I think a career in diplomacy could suit a suave fella much as myself.

That doesn’t mean Ian Bell wouldn’t get “Hulk Smashed” if he looks at me the wrong way though!

Comment by republiquecricket

Angry “drive-by” posters, whether on forums or blogs, are very funny

Tait has to be the brother of Lay Down Sally, the famous rower from 2004 Olympic Games.

Remember how Comical Braces tried playing mind-games in December by calling him a chucker? Now people assumed at the time that Braces was just being a delusional idiot again, but perhaps he’s the great tactical General genius we’ve suspected all along….

Comment by sportsfreak

He has disentegrated the grunt!

It’ll be interesting to see who he chooses for the England Tour!

Comment by republiquecricket

Hot off the press: he’s picked Jessie Ryder for the 20/20 ODI teams.

He’s the Maori McMillan, and if he can stay sober for long enough will hit the ball a long way.

Comment by sportsfreak

So he’s short, ugly and looks like an old soak!

How’s his record?

Comment by republiquecricket

Short, ugly, looks like a young soak and fat…

Huge on talent, but never really delivered to his potential. Like Macca his 1st class record is better than his ODI record which is strange. The press release says they’re looking at opening with him, which is madness. Best coming in at 6. He bowls classical NZ dibbly-dobbly too.

His early claim to fame is that he hit a ball onto the roof of the main stand at the Basin. Cairns and Gilly have hit some huge sixes into that stand, but no-one has come remotely close to putting it onto the roof.

Comment by sportsfreak

I saw his stats on Cricinfo, impressive in 4 day games, but rubbish in ODI’s.
I’ve never known a country produce so many mediocre all-rounders.
It works for ODI’s, which is why you’re rubbish at tests.

Comment by republiquecricket

Nice site, and spot on re Tait.

Looks like he jumped before he ‘did a Tresco’!

Comment by Mark

Thanks Mark…

Actually, it will be interesting to see what the real reasons for it are. There’s rumours, he’s going down the Shane Bond route.

We shall see.

Comment by republiquecricket

Tell us something we don’t know Suave.

The fact we play around 2 test a year possibly doesn’t help much either.

Comment by sportsfreak

That darned Shaun Tait, what with his knowing his personal limitations and taking a brave decision to look after himself and not doing the English thing of waiting until he’s at breaking point – he’s gone and made me like him. How the hell did that happen.

Comment by Miriam

‘Scuse my ignorance, but what’s the Shane Bond route?

Miriam, I feel your pain.

Comment by Miss Field

Shane Bond has had his central contract with New Zealand cancelled, because he’s signed up to the ICL. The unsanctioned Indian limited overs tournament..
There are rumours that Tait is set to take that option.

Comment by republiquecricket

Bond was up-front (kind of) abut his signing with the Satanic Circus (that’s the ICL Ms Field)

If that’s where Tait is indeed heading then he’s being very Un-Australian about it…

Comment by Sportsfreak

OH! That would be controversial. All I’ve heard is whispers about the ICL. I get that it’s a Satanic Circus, and from what I know I can appreciate how it would ruin the game as we know it. What else do I need to know?

Comment by Miss Field

What else do you need to know?

The BCCI / ICC are right in calling for bans for anyone associated with the Stanic Circus.

We must hope this thing breaks down ASAP (along with Bond and Tait)

No money from it goes to developing the game at either a global or international level. It feeds off players developed by people like you and me.

And anyway, it’s only 20/20

Comment by Sportsfreak

So who’s actually set it up? If the money isn’t going to the usual pool of distribution, is that why everyone’s so sensitive about it?

Comment by Miss Field

A modern day Packer has set it up.

It is in competition to everything else going on, and that is why it is satanic.

And it’s 20/20 only

Comment by Sportsfreak

Gotcha. Thank you.

On to 20/Twenty now, if you don’t mind me picking your brains. I like getting opinions of complete strangers. So you don’t think it’ll take off because it’s only 20/20? And do you think the attempt to sell 20/20 to the Americans will work, ever?

Comment by Miss Field

20/20 will only work as a side-show to the real thing. I think it may take over from ODIs one day, but it will never survive on its own.

Also, cricket needs to expand. The ICC Future Tours programme (helping us paupers in NZ, Sri Lanka etc) is all about improving the game globally.

I call on all Indian readers here to boycott the Satanic Circus. Like being with a hooker; the short-term glee and outlay is not worth it.

(Sorry MF is that analogy offends you)

Comment by Sportsfreak

haha I’m not offended, I think it’s funny.

I thought the same thing, that 20/20 may one day take over from ODI. But if it happens, not for a long time. And even then it’s quite unlikely.

I will be interested to see if the Americans pick it up. Actually I heard that in terms of broadcasting, the most money is made in America, because of the enormous Indian population there. I can’t remember the source so I don’t know if it’s true, but it’s quite an intriguing prospect.

Comment by Miss Field

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