Filed under: Cricket, LOLCricket | Tags: Cricket, England, Kent, LOLCricket, Rob Key, Robert Key
This weeks quiz is as follows.
UPDATE
I may have exaggerated this slightly, by a mis-reading of his wikipedia page. He took three wickets in four overs against Victoria. He then scored 138no against queensland in the next match. I thought he’d done both against Victoria, so I’ve changed it slightly..
Further Update: Jrod has guessed correctly. Ray Lindwall was the answer.
Proper quick, unstoppable yorker. A dragon
This is a tough one, but I’m sure someone will get it..
Past winners
See if you can add yourself to the Republique’s Longroom honours board!
Filed under: Cricket, Picture-Metaphor, quiz | Tags: bernard bosanquet, Cricket, googly, ozmoses, quiz, wrong 'un
As I was away on holiday, I never got round to giving the prize for the last six word quiz. That is remedied above. Another picture of pure delight. This one was much harder than the last, as there seems to be about three pictures of Bernard Bosanquet on the whole wwwwwwwweb. (looks like a Harmison over!)
Well done to Miriam for guessing correctly too.
Check again later today, for this weeks “Weekly quiz of wonderment!”
Filed under: Cricket | Tags: Alastair Cook, Andrew Strauss, county cricket, Cricket, Dennis Lillee, England Lions, Ian Bell, Kent, King Cricket, Mark Ramprakash, Michael Vaughan, New Zealand, Owais Shah, Ravi Bopara, Robert Key
The Major Key (thanks to Miriam for this…), King Cricket’s favourite person, in the entire world (he’s close to being mine too), yesterday took the Kiwi bowlers to the sword. Not literally, you understand, metal bats were banned after that old fella Dennis Lillee got arsey.
He clubbed the hapless Kiwis for 178 not out. This now means he’s completed a hat-trick of hundreds against them. “This sort of kick-started my summer four years ago, so it’s a good omen,” said Key.
Sir Robert Of Kentington Key also had this to say..
“Sometimes you have teams as a batter and fortunately at the moment the New Zealanders seem to cop it.”
When asked what his chances of getting back into The England setup were, he said thus…
“There are a few guys scoring runs at the moment,” he said. “Ravi Bopara is getting a hundred most times he walks to the wicket, and Owais Shah is a fine player. A lot depends on what they need. If they need an opener, then I’ll go ahead, if it’s a No. 3, then maybe Owais [Shah], if they need someone to bowl a little bit, maybe Ravi [Bopara] … If they need an old bloke they’ve got Ramps.”
On present form, I’d have Key opening the batting with Strauss. Cook and Vaughan look awful at the minute. Right hand/left hand combo, both in touch, Ravi would replace Vaughan, with Bell at three.
UPDATE
News just in, Robert Key has been selected as captain of The England Lions, as he’s obviously a god.
That is all.
Filed under: Cricket | Tags: 20-20, 20/20, Cricket, Harbhajan Singh, india, Indian Premier League, IPL, Mumbai, Mumbai Indians, twat
Harbhajan Singh has been sensationally banned for 11 games, for slapping Sree Sreesanth. Video evidence was shown, that proved there was no provocation, and Halfwit Harbhajan admitted guilt.
This now ends his IPL campaign for the Mumbai Indians (no bad thing as they didn’t win a game with him as skipper).
The BCCI are also looking into the incident, and may be dealing with this seperately. Let’s hope they throw the twat out.
I can understand the urge to slap Sreesanth, everyone can, but without provocation, you need to be a little more mature in your actions. Especially with a few million people watching.
No, let’s hope that Harbhajan disappears into obscurity, never to be seen again. That smug look on his face makes me want to hulk smash him, crushing all of his bones into pieces.
Filed under: Cricket, fantasy cricket | Tags: 20-20, county cricket, Cricket, EPL, IPL
The ECB & PCA want a product that they can export back to India in place by 2010. The current thinking seems to be regional teams, merging the 18 counties into six regions.
I’ve taken a look at this, and picked what i believe (current players only), would be the best 20/20 teams for each region.
What do you think?
How regions may look
North Northern bastards
Yorkshire
Lancashire
Durham
Michael Di Venuto: Durham
Mal Loye: Lancs
Brad Hodge: Lancs
Jacques Rudolph: Yorks
Paul Collingwood: Durham, Captain
Phil Mustard: Durham. Wk
Andrew Flintoff: Lancs
Glenn Chapple: Lancs
Adil Rashid: Yorks
Matthew Hoggard: Yorks
Steve Harmison: Durham
London shandy drinking twats
Surrey
Middlesex
Essex
Andrew Strauss: Middlesex, Capt
James Benning: Surrey
Mark Ramprakash: Surrey
Owais Shah: Middlesex
Ryan Ten Doeschate: Essex
Alistair Brown: Surrey
David Nash: Middlesex, Wk
Ravi Bopara: Essex
Chris Jordan: Surrey
Danish Kaneria: Essex
Saqlain Mushtaq: Surrey
Southern Softies
Hampshire
Kent
Sussex
Rob Key: Kent, Captain
Michael Carberry: Hants
Michael Yardy: Sussex
Murray Goodwin: Sussex
Kevin Pietersen: Hants
Luke Wright: Sussex
Matt Prior: Sussex Wk
Dimi Mascheranas: Hants
Yasir Arafat: Kent
Shane Bond: Hants
Mushtaq Ahmed: Sussex
Wales and West whinging wankers
Glamorgan
Gloucestershire
Somerset
Marcus Trescothick: Somerset
Craig Spearman: Gloucs
Justin Langer: Somerset, Capt
Hamish Marshall: Gloucs
Marcus North: Gloucs
Ian Blackwell: Somerset
Jamie Dalrymple: Glamorgan
Steve Adshead: Glamorgan, Wk
Peter Trego: Somerset
Jason Gillespie: Glamorgan
Carl Greenidge: Gloucs
West Midlands whiny wasters
Warwickshire
Worcestershire
Northants
Vikram Solanki: Worcs
Darren Maddy: Warwks, Capt
Ian Bell: Warwks
Jonathon Trott: Warwks
Greame Hick: Worcs
Steve Davies: Worcs, Wk
Lance Klusener: Northants
Nicky Boje: Norhthants
Kabir Ali: Worcs
Gareth Batty: Worcs:
Monty Panesar: Northants
East Midlands Middling Meddlers
Nottinghamshire
Leicestershire
Derbyshire
TEAM
Samit Patel: Leics
HD Ackerman: Leics
David Hussey: Notts, Capt
Rikki Clarke: Derbyshire
Jeremy Snape: Leics
Chris Read: Notts, Wk
Greame Swann: Notts
Stuart Broad: Notts
Ryan Sidebottom: Notts
Garnett Kruger: Leics
Nayan Doshi: derbyshire
I don’t know where to start.
There’s been too much cricket and I’ve missed it all.
I broke a tooth on holiday and need to have emergency root canal treatment today.
So I miss a weeks worth of cricket, which is like root canal to a cricket lover. Then I actually have to have root canal!
Damn you giant alien lizards!
Expect me to ease my way back in gently, as I’m slightly fucked up with pain and super strength spanish drugs at present.
Filed under: Cricket | Tags: Bangalore Royal Challengers, Cricket, David Hussey, IPL, Jacques Kallis, Kolkata Knight Riders, Murali Kartik, Rahul Dravid, Shivnarine Chanderpaul, Shoaib Akhtar, Umar Gul
The IPL has officially started with Bangalore Royal Challengers v Kolkata Knight Riders at Bangalore.
Bangalore, who are officially “The Most Boring C*nts In The World”, really shouldn’t win a game in this tournament, with players like Dravid, Kallis & Chanderpaul.
Kolkata have lost the services of Shoaib Akhtar after his five year ban, but have Ishant Sharma & Umar Gul, the wily Murali Kartik and David Hussey.
As I’m on holiday, with little access to Internet, or results, I’ve got no f*cking idea who’s won.
I’ll guess it was Knight Riders, and they win by three wickets or thirty runs.
If I’m wrong, then the world is stupid.
If I’m right, then the world is ace, and everyone except me is a doodyhead.
Filed under: Cricket | Tags: Andre Nel, Cricket, Duleep Trophy, England, England Lions, Gloucester CCC, india, Luke Wright, MCC, Ryan Sidebottom, Steve Kirby, Sussex
Steve Kirby is a first class nutjob. He would cause a fight in an empty room, and he’s on a similar level to Andre Nel. I like the fella, he’s got spunk, he’s got gusto, and he would run in all day for you as a skipper..
He’s played a fair bit of cricket this winter, going to India with The England Lions, where he average 24.10 and took 10 wickets. He then had a run out for the MCC against Sussex, and bowled superbly (in bowler friendly conditions), which should leave him in good stead (although Luke Wright knocking him out, might hurt a bit).
I mention the fiery ginger quick, because of something he said recently.
“It is such a lovely tonic to see Ryan Sidebottom doing so well. He has proved over three or four seasons in county cricket that if you do take wickets, you are noticed,” said Gloucestershire seamer Kirby. “From a personal point of view, he has shown the way which has given players like myself and others in domestic cricket a lot of encouragement.”
I like his attitude, and I like that he looks like he’d eat your mother for tea, if you don’t get the fuck out sharpish. Which is what fast bowling really should be about!
